Grand Cayman

We're all berthed off Georgetown Grand Cayman.
There are five ships most are not allowed to anchor due to the coral on the sea bed, from what I can see it's only the Disney Magic that's anchored.
The other four, that's us the Oriana, the Carnival Victory, the Aida Aura and the RCCL Independence of the Seas are all not anchored but held on position by their engines.
The temperature is in the 80s already and it's only 9am.
We're doing our usual two or three hours by the pool, then lunch and then we'll hit the town..

Montego bay.

What a disappointment! Montego bay conjures up thoughts of beautiful sunshine, miles and miles of gorgeous beaches and Bobby Bloom singing the delights of Montego bay, on the island of Jamaica.
Then P&O go and spoil it all by docking us in an industrial wasteland, trying to pass it off as a romantic tropical port, and failing miserably.
There was literally nothing there except for a run down shopping complex just outside the port gates, where all but one shop and one bar was closed.
We didn't use the shop but did use the VERY overpriced bar for the wifi.
To be honest inside the port building there were some more trinket shops and one even more expensive bar.
You could not walk to anywhere as nothing was within walking distance.
There was a shuttle available at $10 return which would take you to a shopping mall.
We didn't bother with it and after having a beer in the outside bar and using the wifi, we returned to the ship.
By the horror stories we heard later about passengers being ripped off by the shuttle divers it was a wise move.
All in all where P&O decided to park the ship, was second only to Alexandria in Egypt as being the worst place I've visited.
Grand Cayman today and I've been informed that there are 5 cruise ships in port today with a total of about 13,000 passengers on the island, oh what joy!
God I'm doing a lot of moaning this morning....lol
Last time I was in Grand Cayman about 13 years ago, we had a ball, I found a little 'Rasta' bar that sold cheap rum & coke....what an afternoon that was...nearly missed the ship....lol
...I'll keep you informed.....

Hell and back!!

Well as I said we hit the town, that is after a 40 minute wait for a tender.
When we finally got to George town it was like first day of the January sales, there where thousands of people milling around.
We decided to leave the waterfront and take to the side streets, where John spotted a sign for the local bus that could take us to Hell for $2.50 each.
So on we got and sure enough after about 15 minutes we arrived at Hell.
The charge was only $2.50 each as I said, with no messing around or the driver asking for tips as is usually the case.
The driver told is that when we were ready to come back all we had to do was stand at the front of the post office and a bus would be no more than 10 minutes.
For those who've not been to Hell before it's quite an interesting little place with it's volcanic rocks and quaint little post office.
For the princely sum of 95 cents you can buy a postcard and a stamp and send it to your family or friends with the postmark 'sent from Hell'.
We then waited by the road and sure enough within 10 minutes a bus came and took us back to the port.
Once again no hassle or tips wanted.
We even had a chat with a lovely Jamaican guy who works on the island.
I wish our pubic transport at home was as reliable and friendly.
Back in George Town we joined the rather large queue for our tender back to the ship.
There must have been 500 people queuing for the Oriana tender and only 5 queuing for the Aida Aura tender, obliviously the Germans can organise things far better than us Brits...
Their tenders went back and forth like clockwork, ours either failed to launch, which happened with one of them, broke down which happened with another or ran aground on the beach which happened with the third one.
All in all it failed to instil confidence.
The tenders aside we all had a great day ashore, even of we didn't manage to continue our cultural tour of Caribbean bars as we couldn't find one empty enough to get served in the limited time we had left.....

My god the heat, the damned heat!

Day at sea yesterday and the officer of the watch announced a temperature of 26 degrees, well I think he needs a little finger on his watch as the temperature was definitely in the 30s.
Just ask any of the sun worshipers who vacated their sunbeds about 1pm because they were melting in the heat, the beds that is not the people...lol.

Sheila and I had a sun free day and stayed inside most of the time, just venturing out at lunch time for the on deck Bar-BQ, which I'm sure they could have cooked without charcoal...did I mention how hot it was on deck? Lol.

After lunch my bed was calling me so I had a nap till quiz time, you may have noticed that I've not mentioned the quizzes much recently, that's mainly due to the fact that after our good start at the beginning of the cruise, we've bombed out in most of the quizzes.
But we still keep plugging away, we're hoping most of the other teams get bored of winning and stop turning up, thus giving us a better chance of winning. Then again the way we've been performing if we were the only team taking part we'd still finish second....lol.

Sheila and I decided to have an early night and went to bed at 9.30pm, with the hour going back that made it 8.30 pm and the reason for me writing this blog at 4.45am lol.
Well I have had 8 hours sleep plus naps.
It's Montego bay, Jamaica today so Sheila, Jennifer, John and I are going to continue our cultural crusade of the Caribbean.
We've had a few warnings about the dangers of walking around Jamaica alone, but being seasoned travellers and hard cases from Bradford and Liverpool I'm sure we'll be ok......lol.
If that fails I'm hoping Jennifer being almost a local will help..lmao.
It's Monday 25th of February, you know the time and it's dark outside but lovely and warm....

'Buy a drink'

Road Town, Tortola today and we continued our cultural tour of the Caribbean by looking for a cheap local bar, which we initially failed to do.
The bars we passed were either closed or as in one case to expensive at $3 a beer!!.lol
So we headed back to the harbour bar which turned out to be even more expensive at $3.50 a beer but it did have wifi.
I purchased 4 Carib beers, flippin heck that cost $14!! (I'm sure I'm turning into a Yorkshire man)
I then says to the girl behind the bar does the wifi need a password? To which she replies "yes", so I says "what is it?"
She replies "buy a drink".
Then me being the complete knob head that I am says "I've just bought one, in fact I've just bought 4".
She looks at me and I look at her for what seems an eternity.
She then says "right what did you ask me?" I said "is there a password for the wifi?"
She says "yes" once again.
So I says "what is it? 'please' ", thinking she was being funny because I hadn't said please the first time.
To which she replied 'buy a drink'.
I actually opened my mouth to speak when the penny FINALLY dropped 'buyadrink' ......'buyadrink', what a clever password, far to clever for me obviously.....LMFAO
On the way back to the ship we found a proper local bar doing beers at 2 for $5 and rum punch and something called a pain killer for $5 each, John insisted we tried one after our beers, I had a rum punch and he had a pain killer.
I can tell you they both killed pain, until the next morning when they then caused pain....will we ever learn? ....lol.

Yummie Yummie

St Kitts today and it looks like we're doing a tour of the Caribbean by local bars.
Today it was Yummies bar and Snackette, which is a typical Caribbean type bar serving local beer and local food which mainly seemed to be rice and beans served with salad. (eat in or take away)
Once again we just sampled the beer and gave the food a miss, I'm sure one of these days we'll be brave enough to try some, somewhere...BBB
We had the craic with the owner who called himself 'film star'because he'd met the Prime Minister of St Kitts and had a photo to prove it. I must admit in the photo dressed in his white fedora hat and white suit with matching white shoes and blood red scarf he did look every inch the film star. Just a pity in real life his tatty shorts and Tshirt, flip flops and crooked teeth ruined the illusion, he was a nice guy though.
We then headed back to the port and found another bar there called 'Te Pau' which sold Carib beer at 99 cents a bottle! Bloody hell, we'd just been paying $2 at 'Yummies bar'....lol.
After 'Te Pau' we returned to the ship for a well earned sleep.
Later that evening on board ship there was a 'Caribbean Pool Party' but we didn't stay as it mainly consisted of 60 to 70 year old pensioners 'dad' dancing to Bob Marley, and that is not a pretty sight. So we finished the evening off in lord's Tavern listening to the brilliant 'Intermission Duo' with Kandy singing at her brilliant best. Then off to bed for another well earned sleep.
Tomorrow it's Tortola, which is just about the most beautiful island I've seen and because we've all seen it before and done the tours and the beach, I think just for a change we'll suss out a local bar, and continue our cultural tour of the Caribbean....hic!...
Jennifer has had a text off Hazel & posh Peter, and I believe you're reading the blog guys, so this is a quick hi from us all, and we really do wish you were here xx

Sandra's bar is the place to be

Well St Lucia was good this time round.
For one thing everything was open, so there were plenty of shops and things to see, which there weren't last time.
We got some free internet outside a shopping centre not far from the ship.
Then we had the piece de resistance "Sandra's Bar", which was a shack with seats, by what passed for a river, but looked more like an open drain, but if I'm honest it didn't smell, well not much....lol.
In Sandra's bar you could get local Piton beer for $1.20 a bottle and if you were brave enough you cold sample the delights of smoked herring and cucumber salad.
This delightful local delicacy looked and smelled awful, but Jermain, who was one of the local characters in the bar waxed lyrical on the delights of this wonderful dish.
We were all panicking in case he offered us a taste, which thankfully he didn't.....phew!
The place was full of locals coming and going one of them was a girl whose name I didn't get, who before her shift behind the bar at an all inclusive beach resort, sank four or five bottles of guinness, while telling us of the free shots to be had while she was working in the hotel bar....lol.
All in all it was a great afternoon where we met some real people and not one of the expensive and contrived trips from the ship where the things you see and people you meet are all put there for the tourists.

Today we are in St Kitts & Nevis, the weather report is good so we should have a good day, I'll keep you informed.....

Funchal Madeira

We landed at Funchal on the beautiful island of Madeira this morning and after breakfast three of us that is John, Jennifer and myself decided just to have a walk around the town as we'd been to the island many times before and done the tours etc. Sheila stayed on board as her back was playing up again.
We headed for the local market as Jen and John had not seen it before. It's quite an interesting place it's on three levels the ground floor level and the first floor mezzanine level sells all manner of exotic fruit and veg, some of which the stall holders offer you to taste.
The lower level is the fish market, there you can buy some of the most unusual and grotesque looking sea creatures known to man....Lol
After visiting the market we headed to the Beatles yacht in the harbour, it apparently was owned by the Beatles when they first became famous in the early 60s and now has been converted into a restaurant and bar, there we had a cold beer and watched the world go by for half an hour.
Very pleasant it was too.
Later back on the ship, while Jen and John went to the restaurant for dinner, Sheila and I went to the Lord's tavern for the quiz as we'd eaten earlier.
It was a TV themed quiz and we were invited to join a team by people we had met on a cruise on this ship two years ago.
I was surprised when they recognized us, but I suppose it's one seen never forgotten lol.
Anyway we won the quiz by a country mile, only dropping two and a half points out of forty....Which only goes to show what couch potatoes we all are and that we should really get out more.....lol
Later we met Jen and John in the crow's nest bar for a few drinks and to watch the duo, who are really good, particularly the female singer who has an unusual and quite brilliant voice, she puts her own twist on all the songs she sings.
We didn't get to bed till turned midnight which for an old codger like me is very late.....Lol
Consequently I didn't get up till 7am this morning (well there's half the day gone...Lol)
It's now 10.15am on Saturday 16th of Feb, the weather is slightly overcast but warm and the Atlantic ocean is like a mill pond....

Testing the ship's webcam

Today we're going to try out the ship's webcam, I've arranged with our Nic to be on the P&O website on the Oriana webcam page at 11am UK time and Sheila and I will be in front of the ship's webcam at 8am ship's time waiving and jumping around.
I've asked her to text us when she's seen us so we can stop before people think we're daft lol.
Other than that there's not a lot to report.....The weather is fantastic, hot, hot, hot and sunny, well it's not sunny at this particular moment as it's only 5.15am, but it is beautifully warm.
I'm guessing after the webcam we'll be sunbathing, I did three and a half hours yesterday, world record for me!...
We saw the comedian again last night name of Lee Wilson, very funny guy, then it was off to bed at about 12 pm, but it was only really 11pm as the clocks went back again last night.
I'm sure that on the way back and the hours are put back on, that if I'm not careful, I'll meet myself getting up....LMFAO.
Well that's about it for now, I've told you the time and the weather, the seas calm....yep that's about it......
It's now 9am and its started to rain a little bit, but it's still warm and I think it will pass and when the sun gets up it should burn off the cloud.....fingers crossed....
10am and the rain, what there was off it has cleared. We're all sitting around the pool area and Sheila has started doing her knitting again, don't think I can remember what she used to do before she took up knitting.....

Land ho!

Today is Thursday 21st February and today we dock at our first Caribbean island the island of St Lucia.
The last time we were here was two years ago and I'm afraid the overall impression of the town we landed at, the name of which escapes me, was not a good one it appeared to be a mixture of the worst places in Wigan and Bradford, but with sun.....
We were twice warned about the dangers of walking in certain areas, once by the police and once by a local barber.
It sort of ruined all the brochure pictures and romantic island blurb....Lol
Anyway, yesterday was nice the weather was once again fantastic, and I did another 4 hour marathon sunbathing session with Sheila, John and Jennifer, but with a slight difference, they were in the sunshine and I was in the shade and even in the shade with the ship doing about 17 knots it was still hot hot hot.
In the afternoon we bombed out of the music quiz only finishing third and there's a new champion team so now we're gunning for two teams...Lol.
In the evening we first of all watched the duo, who were once again fantastic, we asked Kandy to sing "Babooshka" by Kate Bush which she did brilliantly well.
Then later we went to the show which was great we first of all had the classical pianist do three numbers, then Gary Ryan the Neil Diamond tribute act did about four numbers and finally Mr Jimmy James finished the show of with another fantastic set, not only is he still a cracking singer who can belt them out with the best of them but he can still do the moves on stage which for a 73 year old is amazing........

Jimmy James, without the Vagabonds

Yesterday was another mostly uneventful sea day, we did a couple of quizzes that was the progressive quiz, in which we don't know our position yet, as James, the quiz master insists on building the anticipation, by only giving the positions every five days.... God the tension is almost unbearable :-P
The other was the daily music quiz in which we came second to our great rivals, we are now even with two wins each....not sure if I'll be able to manage this continual pressure for the next four weeks....lmao.
One thing I must say is that the entertainment staff on the ship are a 100% improvement on the staff from the last time we traveled on this ship.
It was formal night last night so for a change Sheila and I went to the restaurant for dinner, which was nice but we do still prefer going to the conservatory buffet and eating there.
The headline act last night was the one and only Jimmy James, but without his Vagabonds, who he split from years back.
The guy is now 73 years old and still going strong.
We have seen him numerous times over the years and he never ever disappoints, his 50 minute spot seemed to last for 5 and even after his obligatory encore he left everyone wanting more, fantastic entertainment well worth seeing.
After one last drink we turned in at about 12.15pm, only to be back down at the reception desk at 12.25 reporting an accident!!
Sheila opened the wardrobe to put her dress in when a large bottle of water rolled from off the top shelf and hit her right on the corner of her eye, it was a full bottle and quite heavy, it gave her quite a shock and actually drew blood.
Who the water belonged to or why it was up on the top shelf of the wardrobe we don't know?
I can only guess that the previous occupant of the cabin had put it there and forgotten it, and when the ship was pitching and rolling it has become dislodged and when Sheila has opened the wardrobe door it's fallen out and hit her. She's ok now but it did shake her up a bit....

It is now 6am on Sunday 17th of Feb it's pitch black outside quite warm but the ship is rolling a little bit so the sea must be a bit rough at the min......

God! I hope Bradford win the Carling Cup.

Now people that know me know I have no great love for Liverpool FC, but they well deserved their win against Swansea city yesterday.
Because IMHO Swansea showed no respect either for Liverpool, their own traveling supporters or the premier league, by the performance they put on.
I know they have the Carling Cup on their minds and it would be their first major trophy, should they win it, but their position in the premiership is important too.
Also their supporters who will have had to make something like a 10 hour round trip surely deserved something better than the display their team put on.
As for the old toss pots who watched them on board ship with us they are typical of the armchair supporters most clubs have, with their shouts of this game doesn't matter we'll have a cup next week but Liverpool won't......Well I think next week in the Carling Cup final they will find that Bradford will give them a better game than they gave Liverpool and as I say that takes nothing away from Liverpool who, though it hurts to say it played very well and well deserved their win.
Rant over :-P
Other than that it was a rather uneventful sea day, our rivals in the music quiz have found some form and beat us again :-(
We tried the syndicate quiz later last night and bombed out of that too.
The duo in the Lord's tavern where good again and Kandy the singer is fantastic and can sing anything from rock to folk.
It's now 6am on Monday 18th Feb the sea is nice and calm with just a nice gentle roll and the weather is warm and according to Sheila it's going to be hot today, unless that is, she's read the weather forecast wrong.....we'll see....

Not a lot to report

As usual not a lot happened on a sea day, Sheila and I got a sunbed by the rear pool as the weather was beautiful and I managed 3 hours there which is a world record for me, I'm sure.
We didn't try out the pool as, even though it wasn't rough there was quite a deep swell on the ocean, which made the pool into a wave pool as it emptied one end then the next, it looked like some giant hand was pushing the water from one end of the pool to the other...
One thing I will say about this ship is that you never seem to struggle to get a sunbed somewhere, but I am sure we have some German guests who have sneaked on board, because there are quite a few towels on the sunbeds, early in the morning.
But I suppose I shouldn't generalise as there's an outside chance the culprits are British because as far as I know it's all brits onboard...lol
Well that's enough of that exiting story, I don't want to wear you out with my tales of high adventure on the high seas....LMAO
It's 5.45am on Tuesday 19th February, it's dark outside with calm seas and its beautifully warm....

I'll name that tune in one

Well, Thursday afternoon John, Jen, Sheila and I (with one answer each from Graham and Barry) once again won the music quiz......woo hoo! In second place it was the same team from yesterday and they weren't to pleased...lmao.
And then to top it all later in the day there was a music quiz with a difference in the Pacific lounge, not only did you have to name tunes and give artistes names, but for bonus points someone from your team had to get up and dance to the songs as the answers came out. Well I say dance you had to play air guitar and mine etc.
Guess what we won that too, and the team that came second was, yes you've guessed it, the same team from the afternoon....so I guess we're off their Christmas card list.  Lol.
Anyway it adds a bit of spice to the proceedings........
We're in Funchal, Madeira today, which is a place we all like so we'll be getting off for a walk. We've been told it's going to be 50 odd degrees, so not exactly warm, but warmer than home.
Right now it's 5.30am and we're still at sea, weather is not too bad and the sea is nice and calm.....

The captain's talk

Normally we don't bother going to the welcome aboard party, as they can be a bit boring, the only saving grace usually is you get a free glass of wine (or two) ;-)
So as we don't have any free drinks on this trip we thought we'd go to the party, and as we were first in we had our picture taken with the captain.
I don't normally bother with the captain's photo as sometimes the captain can be a bit pompous and full of himself, but this guy Captain David Pembridge is his name, was lovely.
A nicer and more down to earth captain I've yet to meet, his short talk was interesting and informative and he came across as a really nice guy.
After dinner which we had in the restaurant and was very nice, we went to the show which was a comedian from the black country, by the name of Lee Wilson.
He was excellent, very clean with no fowl language or smut, with an old fashioned style but extremely funny. I'd go and watch him again.
Oh yes I forgot to mention that the four of us that is Jennifer, Sheila, John and myself won the afternoon music quiz, and me having had a couple of drinks proceeded to show our winning prize which consisted of a couple of stickers (which you accumulate and cash in four prizes, such as plastic key chains at the end of the cruise,) around the room thus making us a target for future quizzes....lol.....bring it on.
Anyway it's 9.15am and the weather is overcast and the temperature is about 14 degrees Centigrade....but it's better than being at home freezing or rocks o off....
And the hardy walkers are out on deck all wrapped up taking the sea air, I ventured out just long enough to take the picture below, then I was straight back inside to the nice warm Anderson's bar with the rest of the dead people........

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr Neil Diamond

Well last night's entertainment was very good, well most of it. They act in the theatre was a Neil Diamond tribute by the name of Gary Ryan, he had apparently won Starts in their eyes a few years ago.
He was very good and at times sounded more like Neil Diamond than Neil himself. After the show Sheila and I decided to have one more drink then turn in. So we went to the cabaret lounge but the group was very mediocre, so we proceeded to the Lords Tavener pub, and the act in there was superb, they were called the Intermission Duo,  he played keyboards and guitar and did a bit of singing, but his wife was the main singer and she was fantastic, she was a very bluesy type singer with a bit of rock and jazz thrown in.
They didn't just do covers they did their own arrangements of them, and the good news for us is that they're on for the full cruise.
Today is Wednesday it's 6.45am sand the weather is cold, a few more days and I'll be pissing you off with reports of 80 degree sunshine lol.
8.30am and we've just finished breakfast with Jennifer and John, Jen's gone to the gym and John has gone for a walk around the deck.
Sheila and I have come to Anderson's bar (see pic) for a quiet read and a knit, the knit is for Sheila obviously.
Anderson's bar of an evening is so quiet and miserable, that I'm sure you have to be certified dead to get in lol.
Anyway back to my book........

First night on board

With it being the first night Sheila and I went to the restaurant for dinner, instead of the buffet which we normally use,  mainly so we could see our other friends who are on this trip.
We had a lovely meal and a good catch up.
Pauline passed Jennifer and John and Sheila and I a card each which it turned out was from Hazel and "posh" Peter two other friends who were booked on this cruise but due to illness,  couldn't make it. The card was apologising for not being here and wishing us all bon voyage and hoping we all had a great cruise.
It was a really nice thing for them to have done.
So if you happen to read this blog guys,  thank you both very much and we wish you were here.
Oh btw "Posh" Peter get well soon mate x
I've been looking at some of the other passengers on board and I don't think the ships disco will be very busy on this trip.
I'd say our company is among the youngest,  and we're in our 50s and 60s lol.
I passed Anderson's bar last night and I'm even more certain that you have to be certified dead to be allowed in there, I've never seen a more miserable place.
It's now 6am and the weather isn't to bad, it's cold and the ship is rolling a bit, but no strong wind,  rain or snow.
That's all for now I'm going for another coffee.....
Later today Sheila had her picture taken with a famous film star (see pic)

Beautiful downtown Eastleigh

Spent yesterday afternoon in a working man's club in Eastleigh with Sheila, Jennifer and John,  watching the match, (we won't talk about the game if you don't mind) suffice to say it wasn't the result I wanted.
The place was nice and the members made us feel very welcome and the beer was a reasonable price.....
We had originally gone to a local pub where I was told they had the football on sky.  This turned out to be wrong,  we were given directions to the club by one of the locals, who even phoned the club for us to make sure we could get in. He was a star, and as I've said the club was good and we had a bit of banter with the locals, who at one time after united had scored and I wasn't happy all started doing impressions of Harry Enfields curly haired scousers and all saying " calm down, calm down" in the worst Liverpool accents I've ever heard. But out was great fun and it's definitely a place I'd visit again.
Except for the result of the match it was a great start to the holiday.

One more sleep

Jennifer has just texted me saying 2 more sleeps before we go.
But I told her it's only one as I count the Sunday as the start of the holiday, because we're spending the night before the cruise in the hotel in Eastleigh.
Not looking forward to the drive down there though as it's forecast heavy snow  :-(